What is JESUS' descent?

As I was reading and surfing I found this article which I'd like to share with my fellow blog-whores....

Have a fantastic read.

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS JEWISH

1) He went into his father business.
2) He lived at home until the age of 33.
3) He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS IRISH

1) He never got married.
2) He never held a steady job.
3) His last request was a drink.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS PUERTO-RICAN

1) His first name was Jesus.
2) He was always in trouble with the law.
3) His mother did not know who his father was.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK

1) He called everybody "brother".
2) He had no permanent address.
3) Nobody would hire him.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS CALIFORNIAN

1) He never cut his hair.
2) He walked around barefoot.
3) He invented a new religion.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS FRENCH

1) He never changed his clothes.
2) He only washed his feet.
3) He didn't speak English.


THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS BRAZILIAN

1) He survived on miracles
2) He was harassed by the government and politicians
3) He never had any money


THREE PROOFS JESUS WAS KENYAN

1) ?
2) ?
3) ?

Why men should not write advise columns

A woman is very troubled by the happenings that have occured lately in her life. She decides to write to a columnist about her recent revelation.

 She writes;

Dear John,

I hope you can help me. The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching TV. Unfortunately, my car stalled and then it broke down about a mile down the road, and I had to walk back to get my husbands' help. When I got home I could not believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbours' daughter.

I am 32 and my husband 35 and the neighbours daughter 19 years. We have been married for 11 years. When I confronted him he broke down and admitted they had been having an affair with her  for the last 6 months. He won't go for counselling, and am afraid am a wreck and need advice urgently.

Please help,
Sincerely,


Sheila.



After a week, she read this in the column:

Dear Sheila,

A car stalling after covering such a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine.

Start by checking there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all the grounding wires. If none of these solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the injectors.

You might also consider buying a mobile phone.

I hope this helps,
John

OH MY ! FACEBOOK!!!

 I sit and think of what I would be doing if i still had that facebook account of my mine. Friend request, join groups, play be a tycoon, send gifts, accept friend requests and ignore event invitations...

Too much of that, facebook got rather boring (i know that)...same old stuff...remember am not hating just saying... I now could be dealing with the issue of accepting babies friend requests(what do you call someone under 13 years?) or constantly ignoring my dad and mum's friends requests for the umpteenth time....(for Chrissakes you are my dad not my friend...wait till facebook introduces add as a son request)

Much as I loved to remain single in the status it always brought me dire consequences...lemme not name them.... I would if facebook had the 'mind your own business' option..... yet i agree with someone who said fb had better have a single&satisfied option.....fb got me so many blind dates than i could ever have all my life if there was no facebook...(ONE POINT TO FACEBOOK)

You know when i say fb is full of people of all kinds...but mostly the psychos, idlers, freaks and all others i can not name.... check for example this:

What would call this? DISPLACED HUMOUR?

Another :

Okay...thats funny i must say.... and i can laugh at that...

Can you imagine this now...? If it were for real?

Cant i say comfortably that all these guys are way crazier than you might think?
What else have they created or done that you can not imagine?

Finally;
Twitter is the place to be

Amasy

VALENTINE's Day Card

this is an actual image of a card sent to a lover on February the 14th......

Come to think of it....

If you received the same?

Flow Chart Diagrams

Now another example of how things are seen from different a perspective.I wonder what these ass-bums think of when they sit an just come up with such stuff..

On the contrary, it is awesome. Think about it ......

I think its a procedure that all men should adapt.
Or what do you think?

wonder why everything has more than one side?

Look closely at everything around you.. if asked most of us would talk about lots and lots of things about them. But there is something we all would likely miss out on
Why did God create things differently?

I dont know whether its the opposite of the other or its the thing that is not: the opposite of nokia could as well be telkom booth, blackberry, motorola depending on what you first think of Nokia as.Things such as a coin and note,legs and hands, crocodiles and cows ...

A woman and man, skin and fur, advantages and disadvantages, leaders and followers, depressants and stimulants, gay and straight, rich and poor, healthy and sick, intellectuals and dumb-asses, tables and chairs, music and drama, birth and deaths, hairy and bald, blacks and whites, computers and abacus , mathematics and science, writing and deleting, saying and denying, fighting and making up.

The Bible and the Quran, the evil and the good the present and the past

Perhaps you should think about the contrasting factor in all these things. What is a contrasting factor then? Well, that depends on what description you give to the word CONTRAST.

A FEW QUESTIONS:
Why would you have a boss and clearly you know you can be one yourself? Why do you walk or take a mathree when clearly you can drive?
A: (shrug) :-(

Why do you stay where you are when you can be living in a 'better' estate ? why do some have parents and others not?

Why is fate always against you. Is it your destiny to be who you are or is it because of someone else that you are there? I wonder why i would drink fanta while someone not far from me is taking a chilled bottle of beer....
I wonder why me and other blogwhores do that yet most of the people think we are wasting too much time blubbering for nothing or not caring to read at all

Why does she have a much-handsome boyfriend than yours?(maybe u didn't look well afterall!) Why did she/he lie to you? Think of what you did or did not do.

Apparently, we have no control of where we came from but am strongly convinced that we are the ones who determine where we are headed to.Lets stop looking at the 'negative' side of something with contempt. It might change and help us to be who we always have wanted to be in life.

Don't underestimate somebody just because he is not in your capacity. May be he/ she can do much more than you are if he was where you are right now.

Oh, what was the reason again to write this?